9 "Does Job fear God for nothing?" Satan replied. 10 "Have you not put a hedge around him and his household and everything he has? You have blessed the work of his hands, so that his flocks and herds are spread throughout the land. 11 But stretch out your hand and strike everything he has, and he will surely curse you to your face."
I've been struggling like CRAZY these past few days with this one question: do I really love God for who He is, and not His blessings?. It's plagued me so much that I think--I'll never be sure, but I have a feeling--that a demon possessed me last Friday night during retreat. It was a really dangerous spot to be in, and I'm still recovering from the incident. Ultimately, like Job at the end of his book, I received not a direct answer, but a simple thought to chew on: God loves me for who I am, and not what I've done. More and more, God's love, as displayed on the cross where His Son died has given me peace in my heart. I guess I've been learning that my question really doesn't have an answer simply because it contradicts God's character. What I mean is that it's in God's nature to give me blessings. I can't exactly ask Him to take away the many gifts He's given me. And never, ever will I let go of His cross. I guess I'll never know if I love God apart from His blessings because He first blessed me with the cross. And His cross shows that He loved me first. I guess that's all there is to it: I love God because He loved me first. I pray that God reminds me of this simple truth every day.
I called You answered
And You came to my rescue and I
I wanna be where You are
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